The ESPN LSSP

one more girl to deal with =)

2006-02-28T16:44:00.000-08:00

WELCOME BABY MADI!!!!

2005-12-20T19:49:00.000-08:00

FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE
1. student assistant/grader for the english dept. at baylor
2. greeter at the art gallery at baylor (most boring job ever..only 2 months...i basically said "welcome to the art gallery and then punched a clicker to keep count of visitors)
3. tutor at the options high school program for mclennan county
4. lssp

FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND
1. pirates of the caribbean
2. napoleon dynamite
3. the count of monte cristo
4. saved

FOUR CITIES / TOWNS YOU'VE LIVED
1. hearne
2. waco
3. conroe
4. tba in several months

FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE(ed) TO WATCH
Right now...
1. scrubs
2. arrested development
3. the office
4. gilmore girls
5. amazing race
6. survivor
7. smallville
8. extreme makeover-home edition
ok, so i watch a lot of tv.....

Loved to watch...
1. 2 guys, a girl, and a pizza place
2. boston public
3. ed
4. the mole

FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION
1. nyc
2. boston
3. indianapolis
4. orlando

FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY
1. espn
2. wacotrib
3. baylorfans
4. nbc, cbs, abc, fox, thewb....gotta find out when my shows are on

FOUR OF YOUR FAVOURITE FOODS
1. chicken fajitas...especially my dad's
2. mom's chicken casserole
3. lasagna
4. chicken fried steak

FOUR PLACES YOU'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
1. nyc
2. colorado/new mexico/nevada...any place with some slopes
3. australia
4. cozumel....soon enough =)

coming home

2005-12-18T21:28:00.000-08:00

WELCOME BACK ADAM!!! glad you finally came to your senses =)

alright "alwaysfeelingblessed," you better ace those upcoming interviews in the d-fw area and cancel the one in houston =)

the next coach K

2005-12-03T21:41:00.000-08:00

i have a friend who is the basketball coach for a high school team comprised of players from mission waco. he was looking for some assistance with the team, so who better to ask than me!
bet you didn't know i had some sweet b-ball skills =) it's been kinda entertaining for me to tell my friends that i'm helping out with a basketball team because the reaction is the same for those that are closest to me.....laughter, followed either by "YOU?!?" or "HOW!?!" hey, give this white boy some credit. i played ball until i was about 15, and i would dare to say that rose marie blvd. in hearne has never seen a better post player. of course, it did help that i was at least 2 years older than every other kid on our block. ah, there was nothing better than dunking on your friends on a lowered goal. so it looks like i'm now the assistant basketball coach...or is it the assistant to the basketball coach??? (if you don't get this, please start watching 'the office' on nbc tuesday nights)

for the girls out there who don't get my title: mike krzyzewski, the coach of duke university, which is the #1 college basketball program, is referred to as coach K. now you can impress your boyfriend/husband with your knowledge of sports....

the people you meet

2005-12-03T21:36:00.000-08:00

here's the easiest way to earn some spending money. i participated in this research study involving soft drinks. answer questions about soft drinks for 90 minutes, earn 75 bucks. the whole rating and explaining your answers got boring quickly, but fortunately, my group members were anything but. my group was placed at the dr. pepper table. to say that i was different than my group would be quiet an understatement. there's no doubt in my mind that the other guy in our group was high. he showed all the typical signs, and the fact that the two women in the group also mentioned it, confirmed my suspension. he had a ton of classic random comments, but my favorite was this. dr. pepper is thinking about coming out with a drink called "23," based on the 23 flavors used to create it. the can will be red and black. as soon as the guy sees the can, he excitedly says, "oh no, they're going to get sued over this! they're going to be sued!" naturally, the faciliator has to ask what the heck he's talking about. he replies, "michael jordan is going to sue them! they stole his number and chicago bulls' jersey colors!"

now on to one of the girls, who i'm almost positive had to represent the beautiful city of bellmead (if you know bellmead, then you'll understand after her description). side note you need to know: to be in this study, you had to be between the ages of 22-29. based on looks, i would say she was about 25-26. after one of the ideas was presented, she made a comment that her children would love that product. she then goes on to say, "Yeah, all five of my kids would drink that." FIVE KIDS! are you crazy! why do people do this? my favorite moment of the bellmead girl occurred after the study was over. as we were walking out, she grabs a soft drink and a bag of chips that were provided as a refreshment. then, it's like a light bulb went off in her head and she thought, "hey, i have five kids at home." so, she turns around, walks back to the table, and starts picking up more refreshments to apparently take home.....no kidding

one more new toy

2005-11-28T16:17:00.000-08:00

here's the new cell phone!
a nano and a new cell phone within 48 hours of each other.....buying birthday and christmas presents for myself is awesome!
http://www.letstalk.com/product/product.htm?prId=29325

all i can say

2005-11-27T22:44:00.000-08:00

so it's been four weeks now since "that day at ubc." it's strange, but i noticed that i have referred to the day that kyle passed away simply as "that day at ubc" on numerous occasions. it's like if i don't verbalize what exactly happened, then maybe, just maybe, it didn't really happen.

the reason i'm writing about this right now stems from our church service tonight. church is so odd now. ubc had become such a sacred place for me. no matter what mood i was in, no matter what was going on in life, i could go to ubc and somehow find God. i knew He was there. i knew He heard me there. He encouraged me there.

all that has changed now. as i sat there tonight, two emotions were prominent: anger and sadness. during worship, i mainly just stared at the screen without singing. i looked at the words and questioned whether or not i actually believed what had been written as lyrics. i want to believe. i can't stress how incredibly bad i want to believe.

i haven't been able to pray once since that day without questioning whether or not my prayers are meaningful....or even if it's worth the time to pray. i mean, i was praying, as was others, for a man to live, and the opposite happened. and now, my confidence in prayer is shattered. it's not because a prayer went unanswered. that's happened previous occasions and it didn't bother me because it was never of this magnitude. on those other occasions, i would basically tell myself that God had some different plan for me and just to trust Him. and for the most part, i could do that. but this prayer wasn't about me. it was about kyle. it was about kyle remaining alive. so now i have this feeling that my prayers, compared to that prayer, are so trivial. and if the most important prayer goes unanswered, then why even bother with the minuscule ones.

i realize that doesn't sound good, but that's what i'm trying to work through. i'd do anything right now to have the type of faith again that i had when i first became a christian. i haven't given up hope that it could happen, but at the moment, i'm frustrated and confused on how that can come about.

birthday party (30-1)

2005-11-27T21:00:00.000-08:00

i think, without a doubt, that my 29th birthday was the most enjoyable one to date. i would like to say that it was so great because of the people i spent time with that night, but i think those that were there all know the real reason it was so fun for me. just kidding! although...the drinks were incredible. combine a diaquari, a margariata, several shots and a couple other drinks that friends handed to me and you definitely get a different person than the typical me. i really don't know if i was drunk...i guess those there could answer that. i definitely know i was tipsy and feeling really good. the night started at t.g. jorge's in austin. nice little mexican restaurant. best memory from there was the drinking contest to see who could finish their margarita the fastest. at the time, it sounded like a great idea. but wow, that was some potent stuff. after the restaurant, we went to dave & buster's. everything at d & b's was awesome. ddr was completely insane...those stupid arrows seemed to be flying on the screen at sonic speed. the basketball game was my favorite. i started the night on fire, but after that it was like there was a lid on the rim. having that drunk speech therapist next to me throwing her basketballs at me and trying to push me down when i shot didn't help much either!

so next year is the big 3-0. that freakin' sucks! i saw the friends episode a couple of weeks ago where rachel turned 30 and was agonizing over the list of her life's goals. i'll probably be revealing my list on here soon....especially since i only have 361 days left to achieve some of those things =(

the joy of waking up at 4 a.m.

2005-11-27T11:31:00.000-08:00

so i had never done this day-after thanksgiving shopping event until this year. i've always heard it was crazy in the big cities, but what about in waco? waco would be calm, right? i could show up at best buy several minutes before 5 and everything would be fine...right?

when i saw the line of traffic exiting off of the interstate at 4:45 i knew i was in trouble. then when i discovered that there were no parking spaces left in the best buy parking lot and saw people walking back to their cars in disgust over the line of hundreds outside, i knew i was in big trouble. but, i didn't wake up at 4 in the morning for no reason. about 15 minutes after the doors open, i finally made it inside the store as those early-birds were already walking to their cars with computers, tvs, etc. my main purpose of going to best buy was to get an iPod nano. on page 7 of the best buy sale was the nano, with what i thought was a great price. it wasn't until standing in line for about 20 minutes that i got a phone call and discovered that i could have purchased the nano online for the same price (hey buddy, if you would have been awake enough at 4 when i called you, you could have told me then and i could have gone back to sleep....but no, you had to sleep in...jerk) fortunately,i bought some dvds and cds that were marked way down so i did save money. after waiting in line for an hour and ten minutes, i finally reached the beautiful land of the checkout counters.

after surviving best buy, i hit the mall, which was relatively peaceful. i started at gap, and to my surprise, one of the workers there basically became my fashion consultant. i'm used to the following conversations with store workers:
worker- "welcome to gap. can i help you with something?"
me- "no thanks, just looking."
worker- "ok, let me know if i can help" as they walk away.

this is exactly how our conversation began, but the guy didn't walk away. instead, he basically became my personal fashion shopper for the next 30 minutes. really bizarre. i went to the dressing room to try on two sweaters and next thing you know, he's bringing me different types of sweaters...and then jeans...and then buttoned-up shirts to wear under the sweaters. this person was like the guy version of ryna, and almost as good, but not quite. =)
after all the fun, i purchased three sweaters...saved like $40 bucks. not great, but that $40 will now be spent on my new cell phone i'm off to purchase.

a gift

2005-11-03T15:52:00.000-08:00

here is an excerpt from the sermon that kyle was prepared to give this previous sunday. it really defines what life is all about, doesn't it?

Live. And Live Well.
BREATHE. Breathe in and Breathe deeply.
Be PRESENT. Do not be past. Do not be future. Be now.
On a crystal clear, breezy 70 degree day, roll down the windows and FEEL the wind against your skin. Feel the warmth of the sun.
If you run, then allow those first few breaths on a cool Autumn day to FREEZE your lungs and do not just be alarmed, be ALIVE.
Get knee-deep in a novel and LOSE track of time.
If you bike, pedal HARD… and if you crash then crash well.
Feel the SATISFACTION of a job well done—a paper well-written, a project thoroughly completed, a play well-performed.
If you must wipe the snot from your 3-year old’s nose, don’t be disgusted if the Kleenex didn’t catch it all… because soon he’ll be wiping his own.
If you’ve recently experienced loss, then GRIEVE. And Grieve well.
At the table with friends and family, LAUGH. If you’re eating and laughing at the same time, then might as well laugh until you puke.
And if you eat, then SMELL. The aromas are not impediments to your day. Steak on the grill, coffee beans freshly ground, cookies in the oven.
And TASTE. Taste every ounce of flavor. Taste every ounce of friendship. Taste every ounce of Life. Because-it-is-most-definitely-a-Gift.

interview

2005-11-01T21:14:00.000-08:00

http://leadershipblog.blogspot.com/2005/10/leadership-blog-interview-kyle-lake.html

still believe

2005-11-01T07:49:00.000-08:00

i first heard this song two years ago, but i've never really appreciated the lyrics as much as i do now.

"I Still Believe"

scattered words and empty thoughts/seem to pour from my heart
i've never felt so torn before/seems i don't know where to start

but it's now, that i feel/your grace fall like rain
from every fingertip/washing away my pain

i still believe
in your faithfullness
i still believe
in your truth
i still believe
in your holy word
even when i don't see you
i still believe

though the questions/still fog up my mind
with promises/i still seam to bear
even when answers/slowly unwind
it's my heart/i see you prepare

but it's now, that i feel/your grace fall like rain
from every fingertip/washing away the pain

i still believe
in your faithfulness
i still believe
in your truth
i still believe
in your holy word
even when i don't see you
i still believe

well the only place i can go/is into your arms
where i throw to you/my feeble prayers
in brokeness i can see/that this was your will for me
help me to know you are near

"love God, embrace beauty, and live life to the fullest"

2005-10-30T20:34:00.000-08:00

this is one post i never imagined writing. sometimes life makes absolutely no sense. as most of you know by now, the pastor at my church, kyle lake, died during a freak accident at church this morning. somehow he was electrocuted while preparing to baptize a member. kyle went into cardiac arrest and passed away later this morning.

how does something like this happen to such a great person? ubc is unique, and kyle had a lot to do with that. it's been cool over the years watching kyle develop as a preacher. he's had a huge impact on my christian beliefs. i can honestly say i'm a better christian because of his teachings. i know my friends would agree regarding their lives as well. kyle was one of those preachers that made you realize how much God does love you and how important that relationship with him is. when i lived in conroe, one of my favorite things about coming to waco on weekends was attending service at ubc. when i moved back to waco, i tried several other churches, but i always returned to ubc. kyle had a big part to do with that. being at this church now for almost 5 years, there were moments when i'd get a tired of hearing a story that he told in a sermon the previous year. now, i'd give anything to hear some of those great stories again.

when you read this, please pray for kyle's wife, jenn, and his 3 children. i can only hope that i have as much love for my wife and children as kyle had for his. also pray for the congregation as we deal with this tragey. ubc is going to be fine, it just may take awhile. thanks for the prayers and all your phone calls today. love you guys

still here

2005-10-23T17:23:00.000-07:00

first, let me apologize to my fans for going 2 weeks without an entry. there are two main reasons why i haven't written: work and being mentally and physically drained at night. the previous week and last weekend, i spent a lot of time working on a tough case. i even went to the office for several hours on a sunday....which i hope to NEVER have to do again. if i got paid overtime, maybe. but being in an office on a weekend when the temps are in the 80s isn't my idea of a good time. but, the hard work paid off, i was pleased with my report, and what i thought was going to be a tough meeting turned into a routine one. so to celebrate, a little trip to on the border for some margaritas was needed. i really should take advantage of happy hour more often.....

regarding this exhausted feeling, i need something to give me some energy during the weekdays. seriously, the only things i've done after work the last two weeks are a.) watch tv at home, b.) watch tv at friends, c.) go out to eat before watching tv, and d.) chatting online. other than going for a quick jog around the apartment one night, i haven't even worked out on the weekdays. i've started to get ready for bed around 10:00 3 nights this past week, which is unheard of.

so yeah, nothing major or incredibly eventful going on in life at the moment. but, i at least wanted to put in an entry to let you know i hadn't forgotten about this thing. i'm off to update my resume and make it look even more impressive =) until next time...

the weekend

2005-10-09T18:34:00.000-07:00

here's some highlights from the weekend:

- first meal at diamondback's. i could get used to eating filet mignon. hey co-workers...i mean, friends....can we do our weekly lunch there this week?

- baylor won our first ever big 12 road game! 2 more wins until i get to schedule a bowl-trip over the christmas holidays. com'on independence bowl in shreveport

- i've found another tv show to get hooked on: the office. don't like it as much as arrested development, but it's still entertaining. i couldn't help but think how much more enjoyable my job would be if our office turned into something like that.....maybe that can be the goal for our "professional development" day this friday

- i ran 4 miles after church! my previous high was 3.2 when i ran a 5k several years ago. these trails need to be incorporated with my current running program....my calves look damn good tonight

the happy list

2005-10-07T15:59:00.000-07:00

woohoo! another week of work is behind me. if my calculations are correct, 149 work days until summer break...and then what???? so with that bit of good news, let's take a look at ten songs that put me in a good mood. these are in no particular order, except for #1. that song rocks.

10. kiss and tell - michael tolcher
9. flowers in the window - travis
8. beautiful day - U2
7. the remedy - jason mraz
6. beverly hills - weezer
5. i don't want to be - gavin degraw
4. bigger than my body - john mayer
3. this side - nickel creek
2. faith like a child - jars of clay
1. we win - david crowder band

somewhere in between

2005-10-02T21:42:00.000-07:00

let's go to my launch station to see if i can decipher anything from what's played. actually, i'm really starting to desire an iPod. last night, out of nowhere, i thought, "i need an iPod." in the past, i've always "wanted" an iPod. but since i told myself i need it, well then, that means it's a necessity for me now. anyone up for a shopping trip =)

1. changes - 3 doors down
2. stars - david crowder band
3. follow through - gavin
4. beautiful you - bebo norman
5. disappear - greenwheel
6. somewhere in between - lifehouse
7. more - seventh day slumber
8. first week - graham colton band
9. dreams be dreams - jack johnson
10. this ruined puzzle - dashboard confessional

#1, #3, #6, and #9 were the first to stick out. this is crazy, but including myself, i know possibly 9 people that will likely be in a new city within the next year. i guess it's a good thing we're going through all these changes at the same time....it's always easier to support others and be supported when one understands what the other is feeling. #6 is by far the best how i feel about all these changes. i know it sounds like i'm confused or not being completely honest, but i'm becoming good about being happy and sad about something at the same time. if i was in a pessimistic mood tonight, i'd focus on #5 and #10. but, let's be encouraging instead because i want to go to bed happy. i seriously doubt that those who move far away will disappear; and likewise, when i leave i won't disappear from those that remain in waco. and that whole "ruined" puzzle thing...pssh. sure, there will be times things are going to be complicated....that's part of change. i don't see anyone coming close to ruining their new chances though.

the weirdness continues....

2005-10-02T10:57:00.000-07:00

how does this apartment complex attract waco's finest collection of weirdos? i'm sure you remember the entries about the neighbor and the shark-man. now, here's another. i was still feeling miserable yesterday, so i took a mid-morning nap. a little after 11, i woke up and was walking into the living room when there was a knock on my door. it wasn't your typical "knock, knock, knock." it was more like one of those playful, rhythmic knocks that friends do. as i walked to the door, i thought that there's 3 people in waco who would just randomly stop by. however, i knew two of those people were at a conference and the third was supposed to be babysitting. so, i'm a little baffled. then when i'm about 5 feet from the door, the person began turning the door knob over and over, but i had everything locked up. at this point, i'm still thinking it's one of my 3 friends. i looked through the peep hole and saw no one. so i just waited for about 10 seconds. to my surprise, i see this short hispanic man, probably in his 50s, go darting by. what the heck! i knew he wasn't one of the maintanence workers, so why would he be trying to get into my apartment. and besides, the maintanence staff always give you plenty of time to get to the door. so, i become a bit scared. i got dressed and went to office to ask for some clarification. fortunately, my fav worker was in there. she informed me that no one on the maintanence staff was scheduled to go into my place. i then described the man to her, and before i could finish, she was describing him perfectly. she had seen walk by the office. apparently, this little guy and his wife had an ugly divorce not too long ago. she moved here, but obviously he's unsure as to what her apartment # is....i'm assuming she lied to him. lucky me, he's trying to break into my place. the worker then goes on to ask me, "have you noticed that we have some people here who have some serious issues going?" nah...you think!!! why do i have a feeling i'll be calling 911 from some point this year while in this apartment....and no, it won't be for sitting a kitchen fire =)

change is good

2005-09-30T22:36:00.000-07:00

why the heck can i not sleep tonight? due to this cold, i'm doped up on from so many meds that sleeping shouldn't be a problem. so, as i was thinking in bed, i decided i'd read for awhile....and i came across this paragraph from the book "searching for God knows what."

"the very scary thing about religion is that people actually believe God is who they think he is. by that I mean they have Him all figured out, mapped out, and dissected and put into jars on a shelf. you've got a bunch of catholics in rome who think one way about God, and a bunch of baptists in texas who think another, and that isn't even the beginning. it goes on and on like this, and it makes me wonder if God created us in His image or if we created Him in ours. in my life, God is always changing the way i think of Him. i am not saying God Himself is changing, or that my theology is open and i blur the lines on truth; i am only saying i think i know who He is, then i figure out i don't know very much at all."

this previous monday basically set the foundation for my entire week (if you recall my last entry). when i came across this paragraph, i immediately thought of an IM conversation a couple of nights ago. the discussion ranged from a variety of topics: what happens to a person immediately after they die (heaven, stay buried until the return of jesus, etc), what is hell, can a person that's not a Christian make it to heaven, what is the central point of the bible, and the always important dating question (should a Christian date a non-believer). let's just say, i think i might have a shocked my friend with some of my responses. my views have changed a lot over the years. when i first became a Christian, i believed everything i was told by others....who i would now say created God in their image. and even after i broke off contact with those people, it's taking me awhile to get rid of some of those beliefs i had. but, as i slowly mature in my walk, i'm beginning to see that God is always changing the way i think of him. and that's an awesome thing.

if you want to know how i feel about the above topics, i'd be more than happy to have a talk about them. like i told my friend that night, i love talking about God to others....it's those times that God seems the most real to me.

a beautiful collision

2005-09-26T21:42:00.000-07:00

spiritually speaking, this has been one heck of a day.
- this morning, a friend calls me to tell me some verses he wants me to look over so we can have a discussion about what happens after one dies.

- at lunch, i get this uplifting email from another friend trying to help me with the confusion of what to do next year. this verse changed his perspective on life, and it's something i'm going to focus a lot on in the upcoming weeks.
Proverbs 16:9:
"The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps."

- after work, i spent about 4 hours at the david crowder band cd release party. the concert was awesome. the cd, a collision, comes out tomorrow. definitely buy it. i 'm listening to it as i type and it was worth the wait.

- after the concert, i had a pretty intense, hour-long phone call from a friend discussing a spiritual matter. i hate not being able to support something that someone i care about is doing. sometimes i just can't. however, that doesn't mean i care any less for them or that i'm disappointed in them. sometimes friends just see things differently....

how important is age?

2005-09-25T17:13:00.000-07:00

i recently had a talk with a friend about the role age plays in dating. she's 29, i'm 28. we were discussing the range of ages we would consider to be preferable for dating. at first we were surprised by the vast contrast. she indicated that her range goes from 28 to 35. i would say my range goes from the ages of 23 to 29. ( i know several of you are like, "hey! you went on a date with a teenager last year! first, she was 20 years old and 3 days....and second, can't you just be happy i was out on a date =o) ) even though my friend is only 9 months older than me, there's a possible discrepancy of up to 12 years in our dating preferences. after we talked about this though, it made sense.

for me, i've always felt like i was born 2 or 3 years to early. with the exception of the friends i met at work, all my friends have always been younger than me. in my neighborhood in hearne, i was the oldest by 2 years. in the most serious relationship i've ever been, i was older by 3 years. at baylor, i came in as a junior, but most of my friends that year were freshman. i was always the oldest roommate in apartments. so since i've always been the oldest, i really don't see myself as being 28 right now...that seems old. i view myself more toward the mid-20s, the age of the majority of my friends. so, that's how i explain why i am more attracted to younger than older girls. of course, i'm sure that if the right girl came along and she's older, i would make an exception. so to all my loyal readers, feel free to leave your preferable dating ages. it'd be interesting to see if most guys feel like me, and most girls feel like my friend.

victoria

2005-09-17T18:38:00.000-07:00

a couple of my friends have been doing a little cool entry in which they hit shuffle on their iPods and let the 10 songs that pop up be an indicator of what's ahead in life. unfortunately, i don't have an iPod yet, but i do have my own radio station at launch =) so, here's the 10 songs that were just played on my station:

1. tonight i wanna cry - keith urban
2. victoria - john mayer
3. sex and candy - marcy playground
4. i know you're calling - jeremy camp
5. everything to everyone - everclear
6. the beautiful letdown - switchfoot
7. here is gone - goo goo dolls
8. graduation song (friends forever) - vitamin C (lol)
9. hymme a' l'amour - josh groban
10. spin - lifehouse

let's see: if i knew a girl named victoria, then she could do #4 in order to come over. i could sing her a #9 to get the two of us in the mood for #3 and then i wouldn't have to do #1. heh heh. unfortunately, i have no victoria's....but this list gives me hope. i have no idea how vitamin C popped up on my station, but this has to bring a smile to my med school friend who was her biggest fan a few years ago. regarding friendships though, i have had some good and serious talks this week with friends in waco and friends all over the u.s. i've been really grateful for my friendships this week because my life seems to be "spin"ning out of control at times. these conversations have either helped me to somewhat regain my focus or have helped me realize i'm not alone and that others are spinning just like me. applying the chorus of that song would definitely be good for me in the future.
"and the world keeps spinning round/my world's upside down and i wouldn't change a thing/i've got nothing else to lose/i lost it all when i found you and i wouldn't change a thing/you and i wouldn't change a thing."

alright, so if any of you meet a victoria, you better give me a call!

only 3 away!

2005-09-17T17:28:00.000-07:00

BAYLOR 20 - ARMY 10

three games, three wins! now, the bears only have to win 3 out of their 8 remaining games to go to a bowl game. since that will easily happen, i decided to look up what bowls we would likely be sent to. the probable choices would be the fort worth bowl, the houston bowl, the independence bowl in shreveport, and the champs sports bowl in orlando. out of those four, you gotta hope for shreveport. can you imagine these baptists raiding the casinos? i can already hear some baylor alumni encouraging fans not to be tempted by those darn riverboats from the devil =)

a bowl game would be awesome, but seriously though, it'll take a miracle for that to happen. now that big 12 play is going to start, any game we win will be a big upset. so, this will likely be the last baylor football post of the year, because i'm scared it's about to get ugly kids. hope i'm wrong....but if not, basketball starts in less than 2 months! sic'em

we will never forget...at least that was the saying at one time

2005-09-11T20:55:00.000-07:00

has it really been 4 years? my memory makes it seem like 9-11-01 just happened yesterday. i remember sitting in an office with a coworker, listening to a radio station and trying to figure out what the heck was going on. when we finally found a tv in the library, it was just in time to see the 2nd tower fall. i can recall the chaos of work as parents were rushing to schools to get their children out in case some attack was to come upon houston. very little work was done that day. when i got home, i immediately began to make phone calls to family and friends. i remember the conversations with my parents, my brother, my grandma, the boston girls, my duke bud, all my friends back in waco. if i wasn't on the phone, then i was communicating with others by IMing. and that was my night until i went to sleep. i remember right before bed, nbc cut away from their news coverage and an enya song was played while showing everything that had happened that day. that was so emotional...there was no way anyone could not have cried while viewing that.

we all know how this entire country united after that. but now, does 9-11 still mean anything to a lot of these people? the first couple of years after, i remember attending candlelight vigils on the anniversary. numerous churches around town held ceremonines. schools were encouraged to be patriotic and did activities to help the students realize the importance of that day. of course, it was all over the media....and the media really pissed me off when they kept showing the planes crash into the towers.

but today was different. i saw on the news that there was only one local organized event, held at a veterans center, to remember 9-11. there wasn't a moment of silence/prayer at church this morning for the victims and their families. the schools around here did absolutely nothing last week to recognize 9-11. maybe i wasn't on the right channels, but i really didn't see much media coverage except for this morning when the families gathered at ground zero. how could the attitude regarding this day have changed so much in just a couple of years? i realize the importance of moving on. but if you move on and forget the past, you're just setting yourself up to become vulnerable to tragedy once again. the victims 0f 9-11, as well their families and friends, deserve more than this.

the battle of the baptists

2005-09-10T23:45:00.000-07:00

BAYLOR 48 - SAMFORD 14

look who's still undefeated. man, i was so close in my prediction that we would score over 50 points. some of you, who hate sports, actually got excited about this game because of my statement that i would buy you food if i was wrong. you aggies are so easy to amuse. so, i'll take you out for some food. however, in order to get your freebies, you must wear a baylor shirt. remember seeing that statement at the bottom of the previous football entry? if not, go back and look. how hungry are you guys now =)

next up for the bears is army in west point. army got drilled today by boston college. if this game was in waco, i wouldn't be worried. however, the game will probably be a lot closer since it's played there. my prediction: baylor 23, army 20. could the bears actually be 3-0??? sic'em

first impressions

2005-09-10T08:21:00.000-07:00

i'm in the mood to go shopping for some new music. i'm looking for something different. new artist. new style. i have a pretty eclectic taste in music, although i typically don't buy many cds. maybe i need to change that. so, as i go out on my music quest, here is a list of my 3 favorite debut cd's.

1. jars of clay - jars of clay - 1995
10 years later, this cd is still one of my most played. i admit i like some christian music, but it's extremely difficult for me to be blown away by an entire cd. this cd did just that. if you've never heard the song "world apart," you're missing out on something special. in my opinion, one of the most powerful songs ever written.

2. john mayer - room for squares - 2001
this cd became a fav the year i lived in conroe/woodlands. if i were writing a blog at that point in my life, this cd would have reflected most of my feelings. it's really cool to listen to a song and think that song perfectly describes your mood, your feelings, your relationships, etc. at that moment. and this cd did that over and over. best song on this cd: why georgia.

3. plumb - candy coated waterdrops - 1999
half christian/half secular. this cd didn't get near enough recognition. for those of you who've never heard of plumb, the best way to describe the lead singer's voice would be to compare it to that of the girl from evanscence. the group seemed to have a ton of talent....the bad thing is that this was the group's only good cd.

the curse of labor day

2005-09-05T12:24:00.000-07:00

growing up, i always disliked labor day. reason: the day after was the first day of school. i was way to spoiled by my summer vacation of countless days at the lake and playing baseball on our dead-end street for hours a day. also, i had this intense fear, probably until about my sophomore year of high school, of going back to school. i mean, i would really panic about it. maybe i had some type of anxiety disorder. then again, it was hearne so i was probably justified in my feelings.

one thing that i had always wanted to do on labor day, since i was 12 years-old, was to attend the u.s. open tennis championships in new york. well, two years ago i was finally able to make that childhood dream come true. the trip was going well until the morning of labor day. we woke up to overcast skies and sprinkles. trying to be the optimist, i knew that by the time our subway arrived at the tennis center, the sun would be shining. man, was i wrong. for the entire afternoon session, my friends and i sat through one rain delay after enough. just as soon as the crew would dry the courts, the mist would return. about 10 hours after our day had started, we finally saw a match. when that match ended, we rushed to a smaller court to see the only other match in progress. we actually we're seated on the 2nd row. it was perfect...for about 10 minutes. then, the rain returned. talk about feeling dejected. what i was planning on being one of the coolest day of my life turned out to be one of the most frustrating. the one positive was that we were given free tix for the 2004 u.s. open. last year, the weather was perfect. we met lindsay davenport, saw agassi dominate, saw sharapova play doubles...it was a good day. so the labor day curse had finally been broken, right???

well, today i wake up with the following schedule planned. do some early morning chores and then watch the u.s. open on tv from 10-10 (if you haven't realized it yet, i love the u.s. open). to my shock and disbelief, the cbs affiliate here is showing a nationwide telethon, that is already on several other cable channels, the entire day. arrgh....freakin' labor day.

raise that bear paw!

2005-09-04T18:10:00.000-07:00

Box Score (Final)

Score by Quarters 1 2 3 4
Baylor.............. 3 3 8 14 - 28 Record: (1-0)
SMU................ 7 0 7 9 - 23 Record: (0-1)

the bears won! granted, it was only by 5, but do you think bear fans care? heck no! we'll take any type of victory. next up: samford. no, not stanford...samford, as in the small baptist school from alabama. here's my prediction: bears win easily and score over 50 points. if i'm wrong, bring this blog post up and i'll buy you dinner. sic'em

* please note: if i take you out to dinner, you must wear a baylor shirt in order to receive your meal

love is patient, love is kind....

2005-09-03T23:21:00.000-07:00

earlier this week i received a phone call from a high school friend. he informed me that he was getting married today and offered an invite. i was a little bit shocked, mainly because i've seen him once in the last five years and have only talked to him on the phone a couple of times. but knowing that this was the biggest day of his life, i definitely had to be there. and plus, i was the only person from school invited and the only non-family member there on his side. wow! i'm one helluva person =) the wedding was really nice. they seem like a really happy couple and i wish them the best.

on the drive home, i was thinking about what my wedding day will be like, if it ever freakin' happens. there were happy thoughts (my mom's sigh of relief, the wedding night, my niece and nephews being a part of it, the wedding night, my friends sharing such a great event with me, the wedding night) and there were some thoughts that were a bit sad (my grandparents not being able to see me married or start a fam). i'm ready for this next stage of life. of course, i know the most important piece of that phase is currently missing. when i was watching and listening to my friend say his vows, i could sense how much he loved his bride. i'm ready to have that feeling. i used to be good with patience...i always considered it one of my strengths. now, i'm more like "to hell with patience." waiting can be really tough at times. i question myself, i question God. i doubt myself, i doubt God. doubting can be unhealthy, yet it happens way too much.

do something

2005-09-01T19:44:00.000-07:00

by now, everyone's seen the damage from hurricane katrina. unfortunately, every day the news just gets worse and worse for the people of those states and their families. as i was driving yesterday, i was thinking about how one day, more than likely, i'll probably meet someone who was either somehow or directly affected by this event. tonight on the news i heard that children, whose families are finding shelter in waco, will soon be attending my school district. so, there's a good chance i'll meet one of these people sooner than i had anticipated.

here's my challenge to everyone who reads my site: do something to help. donate clothes, donate food, donate money....do something. and just as important, pray for these people. the struggles that they are currently facing, and the hardships that they will encounter in the future, will be huge obstacles for them to overcome. they need all the help they can get....

7

2005-08-26T15:14:00.000-07:00

at the request of parker, here's my list:

seven things i plan to do before i die:
1. attend wimbledon
2. vacations in australia, vegas, and the caribbean
3. marry and produce several ricky jr.'s
4. buy a lakehouse
5. learn how to play golf
6. obtain a PhD...in something
7. go to the olympics

seven things i can do:
1. be a committed friend
2. connect with most teens
3. work better with music in the background
4. dominate at dr. mario after a year lay-off
5. watch reruns of friends over and over
6. write with the coolest pencil grip in the world
7. do lists like this when i'm setting in meetings, such as right now

seven things i can't do:
1. dance
2. read for long periods of time
3. go 1 week without some mcalister's
4. sleep through the night without waking up
5. remember that broil is bad when heating up taco shells (just ask the fire dept.)
6. convince those with higher positions that my plan may actually be better (still fightin' though)
7. apparently pick out good household appliances without the advice of friends

seven things that attract me to the opposite sex:
1. intelligence
2. interest in sports/somewhat athletic
3. driven/motivated
4. care for kids/teens
5. faith
6. not materialistic
7. committed to family/friends

seven things i say the most:
1. freakin'
2. idiot
3. mostly
4. what up yo
5. dang it
6. cool
7. that sucks

seven celebrity crushes:
1. maria sharapova
2. jennifer aniston
3. anna nalick
4. elizabeth hasselbeck
5. jessica alba
6. jessica andrews
7. mandy moore

seven people i want to respond to this:
1. nashville bud who's going to get smacked in tennis when he moves back to texas
2. crew at work - you all got plenty of free time
3. BU practicum student - just document this as part of our supervision time
4. PhD student in Wisconsin who needs to hire me as an assistant...soon!
5. future 2nd grade teacher of the year in pflugerville and her "emotionless" sister
6. those in the medical profession....you need to have some fun in your lives
7. everyone else who reads this....all 3 of you =)

EIQ

2005-08-24T20:57:00.000-07:00

i've heard about emotional intelligence, but i had never taken a quiz like this. i think my score fits me pretty well. good thing considering my current profession....

http://www.blogthings.com/eqquiz/

my score was a:
140

meaning:
131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin.

pigskin, hoops, BB6, and...jaws?

2005-08-21T19:13:00.000-07:00

ah, there's nothing like spending some time at the pool on a day as beautiful as today is. the pool chairs at this apartment are incredible. i could probably sleep better out there than my own bed. anyway, i took a report to proofread while i was out there, but instead i just laid down. kinda zoned in and out, but i thought i'd share some of my random thoughts while i was relaxing.

- college football starts in less than two weeks!!! i know, since i'm such a huge baylor fan, one might be shocked by my excitement about college football. believe me, this passion isn't generated from baylor football. i'm well prepared for us to win around 3 games again this year. i just love waking up on a saturday morning, turning on college gameday, watchin' espn throughout the day, and then going to sleep watchin' sportscenter with all the days highlights. can you believe how big of a fan i'd be if i graduated from a football-crazed school? baylor basketball starts nov. 13th...countdown is on

- speaking of baylor basketball, here's my two cents worth on emily neimann. for those of you who don't know her, she was our 3-point specialist who played a big role in the final four last year. two weeks ago, she sent our coach an email saying she was transferring. then yesterday, she announces she's going to play for uc-santa barbara and that she is happy to be playing for a coach who is more interested in his players than winning. in addition, she stated that ucsb was a great place to deepen her faith. hmmmm....ucsb is rated as the 7th biggest party school in the U.S. most students refer to ucsb as standing for "u can study buzzed." so emily, get the hell outta texas. the baylor community supported you more than anyone ever has, and you do this in return? you can't even tell our coach in person. instead, you send a lame email while our coach is on vacation. and now, you're making verbal attacks at our coach. i only hope the bears can play ucsb in the playoffs, so we can harass you the entire game and send your sorry butt home.

- i'll admit, i've been a little obsessed with big brother 6 the last several weeks. so, i was thinking, how would i play the game if i were on the show? maybe i'm just being prideful, but i think i could play the game well and keep my morals and values intact. i assume most people would like me, and i like most people. what would be interesting is when the alliances form and i have my good team battling against the bad team. there have been some people in this world who really annoyed the heck out of me. so, it would be interesting to see how i would react being surrounded by those type of people all day. knowing that everyone back home and millions of people in america are watching should be enough to keep me accountable....i would hope so at least =)

- the last thing i'll share with you is this thought i had: why the hell is a 50 year-old man playing with a toy shark in the pool? i couldn't even make this up. this guy comes to the pool in shorts and a t-shirt with a toy shark in his hand. he then winds the shark up, sits it in the pool, and the shark starts swimming. at this point, no one else is around. the guys leaves the area, but the shark remains swimming. i'm just watching this toy swim around and wondering what the heck is going on. couple of minutes later, a lady comes to the pool. as she's walking down the stairs into the water, the shark is approaching her. she freezes and just stares at it for a couple of seconds. i tried to hold in my laughter, but eventually couldn't resist. she then starts laughing as well and explains that she actually thought the shark was real at first. she grabs the shark and places it on of the pool, with the batteries still running. the guy then comes back and sees his shark, flipping its tail, laying outside of the pool. the lady is swimming laps, so he looks at me and asks, "why is my shark not in the pool?" so i respond, "it scared the lady." he appears a little ticked off, so he places the shark back in the water and the shark actually swims right into the lady, interrupting her lap. this is one freakish toy. she stops, grabs the shark, sees the guy, and is quickly asked why she threw the shark out. thinking he's joking, she starts laughing and says that she initially thought it was real. well, this apparently makes the guy incredibly proud. we then get to hear where he bought the toy and that he's probably going to buy some different marine animals to put in the pool in the near future. uh....yeah, you do that man. can't wait to see the dolphins and manatees in our pool next weekend...

dating, intelligence, and napoleon

2005-08-20T07:24:00.000-07:00

have fun with these. my results are posted below each link.

http://www.datingdiversions.com/

Your dating personality profile:You matched the following traits:

Religious - Faith matters to you. It is the foundation that you build your life upon. You trust that God has a plan for you.

Shy - You are often timid around others, though you will open up when the right person comes along.

Athletic - Physical fitness is one of your priorities. You find the time to work athletic pursuits into your schedule. You enjoy being active.

Your date match profile:You match with women who have following traits:

Religious - You seek someone who is grounded in faith and who possesses religious values. You believe that a religious person can enhance your life.

Practical - You are drawn to people who are sensible and smart. Flashy, materialistic people turn you off. You appreciate the simpler side of living.

Shy - You are put off by people who are open books. You are drawn to someone who is a bit more mysterious. You want to draw her out of her shell and get to know what she is all about.

http://www.blogthings.com/quickanddirtyiqtest/

i liked my results of each subtest of this IQ test, but my overall IQ is much higher than what this stupid test claims! give me the WAIS any day and i'll prove i'm a genius in everything =) here are my subtest rankings:
Logical: Exceptional
Verbal IQ: Above Average
Math IQ: Genius (duh!)
General Knowledge: Above Average

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=12382870827421582817

for all you napoleon fans out there, and i can't understandy why someone wouldn't be, see how well you know the movie. be careful, there's a couple of tricky ones on here. even with a group of six, we still only managed to make a 90 on this.

ad-in

2005-08-15T21:31:00.000-07:00

i really dislike work right now. when i made the following comment, "this is f-ing crazy," (but i really said the f-word) in the office, it's a good sign that things aren't going so well. after another ridiculous day today, i was going to write tonight about how much i wished i could just get a new job tomorrow. but, something changed my thinking when i was out on the tennis court a couple of hours ago.

the main reason i wanted to play tennis tonight was so i could just hit the hell outta something for an hour. and although my game was far from what i feel i'm capable of, being on the court and swingin' away was somewhat therapeutic. it seemed my mind was filled with questions while i was out there. what's the next step for me and the crew? how are we going to fight this battle? will those above us even care? and on and on. one question that i'm still trying to fully answer is "what motivates me?" that's an important question....one that actually requires some inner searching. but, back to my point of this, when i was on the courts thinking about all this stuff, my mind was actually clear and focused. my thoughts made sense. i was calm when thinking about these questions and what was bothering me. it was the opposite of how i felt earlier in the day. this may sound a bit strange, but the courts have always kinda served this purpose in my life when i'm stressed. somehow, focusing on a little, bouncing, fuzzy, light-green ball makes me focus on my entire life.....and in a positive way.

give me a scooby snack!

2005-08-13T21:55:00.000-07:00

sorry for the delay. some of you (gina!) need to learn some patience! but it does make me feel good to know that people are anxiously awaiting my next entry. so, here's the update. when i walked into the office, one of the workers (i'll call her W), came up and said, "ricky, tell me what happened with you and the downstairs neighbor yesterday!" apparently, the worker from my last entry (i'll call her A), had informed the rest of the staff that she saw me discussing the complaint with the downstairs neighbor. W seems to be a really nice, good ol' small town girl. i trust her. so i informed W what had happened and explained to her my defense. immediately, she believed me and was telling me that she would get rid of the complaint. it was almost too easy. one day i'm being accused, and then the next day it's thrown out in a minute. didn't know i had that type of persuasive skills. but, i still had questions. first, who was the person that complained? i'm almost positive i know, but W wouldn't confirm. W did slip and say that when the person came in, "she" asked why i would be hanging pictures at 3 in the morning. second, why was it necessary to come inside my apt. and place the notice? W's response made some sense. she said that the staff is just supposed to open the door, reach around, and tape the paper on the back. they do that b/c they take away the risk of the wind blowing it or something else random happening if they just tape on the outside, and also so they know the person won't be able to say they never received the notice. but still, i think my apt. was entered on purpose.
here's who i think made the complaint. it was one of the staff here, who i referred to earlier as A. after A saw me questioning my downstairs neighbor, i talked to her for about a minute. after i told her i don't make loud banging noises at night (ok, a few of you have had way too much fun with what my supposed banging noises at night are), her response was "it's not a big deal. just be a bit quieter." right there, she was accusing me of doing it. after we went separate ways, i noticed that she walked to the other breezeway of my building. she lives here as well, but i didn't realize she was that close. i'm not quite sure, but i think our bedrooms actually touch each other. the next thing i thought about is how A mentioned that she posted the note in my apartment. then W made the statement about the person saying that i was hanging pictures. this could be complete paranoia, but i think A posted that note in here so she could see what i've done to the place. fortuantely, i've been a bit slow at unpacking, so there are no pictures hung up yet. so, by the time i go talk to W about this, A had already talked to her. and from what i'm thinking, based on my quick defense and that A had seen i had nothing in here that would equal "loud banging", A told W that it wasn't me. but, i have no way to prove this.
at first, i was like, "crap, i didn't live up to the standards set my scooby." i couldn't completely solve the mystery. but then, how many cases did scooby solve by himself??? that's right...i still deserve a scooby snack for my work =)

scooby doo, where are you?

2005-08-11T21:21:00.000-07:00

life at the new apartment was going great until i came home from work today. as i closed the door, i noticed that someone had taped a piece of paper on the inside of my door. having been told that the pest control team was going to be in the apartment today, i assumed that this was a notice from them saying that they had inspected my place. to my surprise, the piece of paper was entitled "notice of infraction." confused, i continued to read. someone filed a loud noise complaint against me! i've been accused of "loud banging late at night for several nights a week." hmmm....if you haven't read my blog before this one, read it. you'll see where all the loud noise has been coming from. so, i go to the office to resolve this ridiculous matter. however, everyone was in a meeting. i returned home and upon the advice of a friend (hey, you really do give good advice sometimes =) ), i went downstairs to discuss this with my neighbor. she was the logical choice to be the person who had filed the complaint. when i told her i wanted to discuss why she had reported me, her smile turned to a blank look. she had no clue what i was talking about it. (if we ever become friends, here's another apology from me for accusing you of the complaint). at this point, one of the office workers was walking through the breezeway. when she saw what was happening, she said, "oh ricky, she's not the one." at this point, i didn't know what the heck was going on. the worker explained that she was in the office when the complaint was filed and that she was the one who taped the complaint on my door. i asked her which apartment i needed to go to clear this mess, and she responded that she wasn't allowed to tell me. i informed her that this person must have me confused with another apartment. she replied that it wasn't a big deal, and that i just needed to be a bit quieter at night. not liking her response, i restated that i never bang things around late at night, and asked if she knew about my new upstairs neighbor. she then told me to talk to the manager in the morning. at this point, my mind is just racing because i want to know who the mystery person is. well, after watching an episode of scooby on the cartoon network and becoming inspired, i began to notice there were several clues that i didn't see at first. (just kidding, i really didn't watch scobby, although to some of you it wouldn't have come as a surprise). i think i finally have this mystery figured out. remember those two-part episodes on shows like scooby? well, this entry will be a similar. check back tomorrow to discover the clues and see if i'm able to clear my name.

in need of mr. sandman

2005-08-10T19:12:00.000-07:00

i'm tired. having about 5 hours of sleep each of the last two nights will do that to you. not that i planned on that happening. both nights i was in bed shortly after 11. on night one, my new upstairs neighbor decided it would be a good idea to arrange his bedroom at 3 in the morning. are you serious? does he have any type of social skills? it's apparent from my balcony that someone is living below him. guess he doesn't care. i slept on a sleeping bag my first night here...it's not that big of a pain. so from 3 until after 5 i hear items being dropped on the floor, hammering, pieces of furniture being placed, and stomping from room to room. you would think this guy weighs 400 pounds as loud as he sounds sometimes. this guy isn't some immature, college student either. he has to be in at least his late 30's. unreal....

on night two, one of the most intense thunderstorms i have ever experienced initially woke me up at 2:45. as the storm became more powerful, i was wide awake from 3:45 until almost 6. i have never heard thunder so loud. on several claps, the thunder actually rattled items in my apartment. with each bang, car alarms in the parking lot would go off. the noise from the thunder and the beeeeep-beeeeep-beeeeep-beeeeep made sleep impossible. watching the lightning display from my bed was entertaining for awhile. once i realized going back to sleep was not at option, i decided to make some breakfast and watch some early, early morning tv. i was able to take a little nap before going to work, but i probably would have felt better if i would have just stayed awake by that point. here's hoping tonight is extremely quiet. then tomorrow, my brain will be functioning enough to think of a real topic to write about.

some quality downtime

2005-08-09T20:16:00.000-07:00

i just found out that scrubs is not returning until 2006. what the heck!!! is nbc crazy? how could this show not be a part of the fall lineup? over the summer, scrubs became my favorite show as i watched season one on dvd. i really don't remember one episode that i disliked. so, as i wait for scrubs to return in the spring, here's a look at some shows i'm looking forward that will have their season premeire in september.

- Gilmore Girls - Sept. 13 - "if you're out on the road, feelin' lonely and so cold..." you know how the lyrics go. this show is just freakin' awesome. i know this isn't a show that most guys would admit to watching, but everyone should give this a chance. love the characters...love the storylines...and this show just seems so real.

- Smallville - Sept. 29 - a couple of years ago, i almost lost complete interest in smallville. however, the show made a strong comeback last year and really became entertaining again. the season finale was intense and left numerous questions to be answered at the beginning of this year. and even if the show sucked, just getting to see lana lang once a week is worth it =)

- Survivor - Sept. 15 / Amazing Race - Sept. 27 - you know i have to have some reality shows on the list. last year's survivor was the best since season 2. hopefully, the cast this year will be comprised of those characters you love and those you hate. if there's one reality show that i would go on, it's the amazing race. traveling around the world for free sounds pretty cool to me. and hopefully, since it seems there is always an 80 year-old couple, my teammate and i would not be the first to be eliminated.

- Arrested Development - Sept. 19 - this is a new show for me. i've only seen the first 5 episodes on dvd from season one. from what i've seen and heard about show, i'm certain it's going to become one of my favorites. the characters are hilarious....the writing is clever...the show should be a huge hit. hopefully, the fan base will start to grow and AD will be around for awhile.

- Joey - Sept. 22 - although not near as good as friends, joey still caught my attention last year. it's just a good sitcom to watch as you lay on the couch and give your brain a 30 minute break. time will tell if this continues to be one i watch on a consistent basis

God and a traffic light

2005-08-08T14:22:00.000-07:00

you know those moments that leave you speechless? here's a recent experience i had. driving on I-35, an 18-wheeler, not even a 1/4 of a mile in front of me, lost control. the truck originally was in the middle lane, but quickly started to take up space in all 3 lanes. incredibly, no other vehicles were beside or immediately behind him. all vehicles behind him, including me, were far enough behind to brake comfortably and watch in shock. i can't even began to describe how potent the smell of the rubber from his blown tire was. fortunately, the guy must have been a gifted driver because he somehow gained control and was able to get in the far left lane and come to a stop.

what made this numbing to me is that if it would not have been for a red light that i encountered before i entered the interstate, i could have been right next to this 18-wheeler when he lost control. the amount of seconds i sat at that red light was probably close to matching the amount of seconds that truck was in front of me. i remembered how, when i saw the light change to yellow, i thought about flooring it and beating the red. i chose otherwise though, and it's likely a good thing. maybe i'm reading way to much into this, but what if i'm not? sometimes i wonder about what all goes on in this world that affect us, yet we have absolutely no idea what those things are. being a Christian, one of my most frequent prayers is that for protection. so did God change the traffic light? was that thought telling me not to run the light from God? and how in the world, at 7 o'clock at night, were there not any cars near this 18-wheeler on one of the busiest roads in the state? it seems that most of the time we want and wait for God to do something big in our lives. i know i do. maybe if i open my eyes to the little things that go on around me, i'll have a greater awareness of God's role and presence. there's no way that i can know for certain God's role, if any, in those events that night.....but i think i'll believe that God was looking down at me and punched a little button that made that traffic light switch.

48 months later

2005-08-07T13:28:00.000-07:00

interesting topic i read on baylorfans.com. the title of the thread asks, "if you could go back and relive your college years, would you?" i don't know what your response would be, but without a doubt i'm sure i would. there's a big difference when comparing my 4 years as a baylor student with the last 4 years. somehow i got this misperception in college that once college was over, life would be joyous and stress would be a thing of the past. i used to get stressed out over papers, projects, finals, having lifegroup functions every freakin' night of the week. now, those things seem so miniscule compared to today's stressors of the "real world." there's really no way you can compare the stress of writing an english paper to trying to diagnose a kid with an emotional disability or trying to change the wrong path a careless kid is following. don't get me wrong, i love the challenge and the responsiblity my job presents. but on those days when work is demanding, writing a five page paper kinda sounds nice, you know? but stress isn't the main difference between the college me and the current me.

probably the most noticable difference, that i experience on a daily basis, between then and now is living by myself. not something i would recommend. i don't think i ever truly learned how valuable roommates, or even friends living next door or across the courtyard, were until they were gone. guess i took for granted that someone would always be there to watch that favorite tv show, to cook/eat dinner with, to have random chats during anytime of the day, to play videogames until 2 in the morning, and to experience numerous other events that would be appear to be so trivial, yet are so incredibly meaningful. i really do miss all that stuff. this isn't a knock against my current waco friends. my friends that i have here are amazing. spending time with them, no matter if it's just sitting there doing absolutely nothing, is enjoyable. in fact, it's the only reason that keeps me in waco. but still, it's not the same as having roommates and that comfort feeling you get knowing that someone will be there at home when you get off work or get out of class....or eventually at some point during the day. it pisses me off sometimes to hear people talk about what they are going to do after work with others, and i'm just wondering if i'll actually get to have any type of social interaction that night or if i won't see anybody again until the next day at work. i don't get angry at the people...i just get angry at my situation. i've lived by myself for four years now. i disliked it on day one, and 48 months later, i still feel the same.....

Y tu?

2005-08-06T13:03:00.000-07:00

Y tu?

"hey, how are you?" a question we all hear on a daily basis. until the other day, this was a question that i've never really given any serious thought to. i was having a frustrating day, so i hoped going to the Y would provide a solution. between reps, one of the workers passed and she asked, "how are you today?" without even thinking, i replied, "i'm good. and you?" she answered, "fine, thank you." immediately, i thought what a freakin' lie i had just said. the day was far from good but here i am putting a smile on my face and acting as if life is wonderful. throughout my entire workout, i couldn't get this incident out of my mind. i realized i have a horrible habit of just saying "good" or "fine" as soon as i hear the question. it's just like when learning spanish. one of the first phrases we are taught is, "hola! como estas?" what's the first response we're taught? "muy bien! y tu? ( I realize the punctuation marks should be upside-down, but I don't know how to do that).

what would happen in this society if people, including myself, started being real with this question? what if we responded with how we truly felt that day? or what if we asked this question only when there was full sincerity behind it? i'm not saying to open your heart to just a casual acquaintance. but instead of just responding 'fine," would it really hurt to say something like, "i've had better days but hopefully things will improve." alright, maybe something not that cheesy, but you get my point. it's like this society has made us believe that we can't show weaknesses. we have to put on this mask to disguise our true self. as i'm typing this, i wonder how that worker's day at the Y was really going. was she really doing well? or did she have several circumstances regarding her life that was creating an inner chaos?

so now, i guess it's up to me. how will i respond to this question in the future? more than likely, i'll hear it within the next hour. and more importantly, when i ask this question, will i really mean it? let's hope so.....

Firsts

2005-08-06T12:02:00.000-07:00

"Firsts"

since this is the first time I've ever created a site, i began to think about other "firsts" that i have experienced. i tried to pick some of the most random facts….things that not even my closest friends would know. hope you enjoy:

- first girl that had a crush on me: alison, i was in the 2nd grade, she was a 3rd grader….aw yeah

- first girl that I had a crush on: alison, one year later….she no longer felt the same though =(

- first trophy: 6th grade UIL math….came in 2nd place in district. however, because i had been sick and missed a lot of school, i was sent as the alternative to represent hearne. alternatives were not allowed to place. so, I had the 2nd highest score and wasn't recognized! Yeah, I was mad! (still am!) everyone in hearne knew I was a math wiz except the freakin' UIL coordinator. so, here's how I got the trophy. a couple of weeks later, my brother comes home with a gift for me. my brother is about 22 years-old at this time. i unwrap the box, and was in complete shock. inside was an academic trophy with UIL math 2nd place engraved on it. pretty freakin' cool….something i'll never forget.

- first time i picked up a tennis racket: 12 years-old (pretty shocking huh? i know i play like i started hitting when i was a toodler) i saw agassi play on tv, went to wal-mart in hearne (before it was shut down), and hit the courts.

- first time i had a pb&j: junior year of college on a mission trip in juarez, mexico. i HATED all sandwiches growing up. But, i'm proud to say that the thing i learned the most from Juarez is that pb&j's are pretty darn good.

- first kiss: senior year of high school. one of the most awkward moments of my life. best words to describe the event are "wet and sloppy." i got better though =)

- first (and only) time to almost drown: roadtrip to hot springs during college. my friend, who is incredibly fearful of the water (well, she can't swim so I guess that's a good reason) decided to ride a seadoo with me. as we were waiting to dock, a boat came along and the waves caused our stationary seadoo to tip. immediately, she began the thrash about in the water. in her mind, in order to save herself, she had to climb on top of me (forget the fact that she was wearing a lifejacket). therefore, i'm continuously being dunked, until…..actually, i can't recall what happened after that =) apparently we both made it to shore. ah, good times…

- first time to experience the death of a friend: first year in college. a friend from high school was killed in a car wreck late at night. thus, this explains why i never fall asleep at night when i'm a passenger and why i still get nervouse when i know i have friends traveling late at night.

- first time to see a professional tennis match: the u.s. clay court championships in houston several years ago. Got to see roddick and agassi. awesome. random thing i remember is that my bud left me during the roddick match to go have dinner with this girl. heh heh. was it really worth it???? =)

- first time i ever wanted to hurt someone: one of the craziest day of my life that leads to one of the most life-changing events of my life. after watching the blair witch project with my friends (not my lifegroup like I was accused of over and over again =0) ), my super-christian roommate thought it was appropriate to tell me i'm a bad influence on my lifegroup. in addition, i was a selfish leader who was destroying the spiritual lives of those around me. well, one thing you should never do is question by loyalty and love to my friends. having some arrogant prick tell me I didn't care about my friends made me come unglued. i remember the shouting escalating, and the two of us getting closer and closer to each other. when he made another comment about my negative impact on my friends, my other roommate who had been trying to remain calm, became upset and got into the face of our other roomie. well, we didn't get into any physical altercations…. although i have wondered what it would have been like =) it essentially destroyed our friendship with the other roommate…and eventually ended numerous "friendships" with other people in that church. i just wasn't following God's path, according to them. whatever. God has used that event to really shape the type of Christian that i've become today, and i have no regrets for sticking up for what i believe in.

- first concert i attended: ok, this is bad. but, growing up, i did listen to country music. for valentine's day, i gave my girlfriend tickets to a clay walker concert. we put on some wranglers and boots and drove up to waco for a wild night of two-steppin'. jk....no wranglers or boots were involved. i have never worn wranglers and highly doubt I ever will…my butt just isn't big enough to look good in them.

- first baylor sporting event: at the age of 5, my family took my to a BU-UT basketball game. i don't remember much about the game, except that ut won by 2 points. well, I'm sure i was decked out in a baylor t-shirt and had my growl towel waving the entire time. anyone remember the gold growl towels? baylor has to bring those back! anyway, i remember telling my grandparents about the game later that night and saying how i was cheering for the longhorns the entire time and that i was so happy ut won. my mom should have slapped the hell out of me. heck, if i could go back in time, i'd slap the hell out of myself for saying that. But after that night, i can never remember rooting against the bears again. sic'em

finally!

2005-08-05T08:27:00.000-07:00

finally! the first entry! i've been talking about this for a week now, but these past 7 days have been a little hectic. i moved again *shaking head* this marks the 8th time in the past 9 summers that i have moved. this became ridiculous about 4 years ago, yet i still continue to move. why do I move all the time? is it the joy i get from watching my friends move boxes and furniture in 100-degree weather, or as the case this year, thunderstorms and lightning?....nah. is it so my friends can get donuts and wendy's from my parents (like previous years), or dinner and mudslides from cheddar's from me this year?....nah, especially to the part about me buying them food and alcohol =) is it some deep psychological problem that I have, like commitment issues?....hmmm….maybe. we'll probably examine that one more in future entries. well, whatever the reason is, i'm getting settled in my new home and now have the time to do this.

why am i doing this? until a couple of weeks ago, none of my friends even had a blog….and I had never considered starting one. but now, with 2 friends blogging and another starting any day now, i thought this may be an entertaining, and even constructive, way to spend some free time. when i was younger, i loved to write. i even began writing a book when i was 12. i wrote about 15 pages on notebook paper (and no, it wasn't double-spaced!), and then suddenly quit. in middle school, writing a book really isn't a cool hobby when you're trying to fit in. after that, i lost all my desire to write. however, reading the blogs of my friends has definitely motivated me to get back into writing. so, here we go. hope you're ready to learn some new things about me, and in the process, i may even learn something new about myself.